A second helping of Thanksgiving

I just returned from my second Thanksgiving dinner.  This one was extra special (not that my immediate family one wasn't).  It was held today because two of my friends couldn't be here Thursday.  They were on their way back from Afghanistan.
We were a mixed group - some immediate family of the young couple (I've known the young woman since she was born), some close family friends.  But we all shared how incredibly grateful we were for their safe return and the fact that they willingly gave up several months of their lives to be there as Americans. 

It's too easy sometimes to forget the sacrifices others make while we sit safely at home, often complaining about the most mundane things.  Despite tough times, most of us still have much to be grateful for here.  But over there, things were much more challenging.  From long hours, to dust storms, to uncooked food, to being far from home, life wasn't that pleasant for them.  But they did it.

What are we willing to do?  Are we willing to give something up to help others who we'll never even see?  Or are we too absorbed in our Black Friday shopping and constant wish for more?  Have we forgotten the simple pleasures we get to experience almost at will?  Real food?  A comfy bed?  Electricity?

On the way home, I heard a little of "60 Minutes" where they were saying that something like 16 million children are homeless and living in cars, motels, outside.  I believe that as Americans, it's time we all stepped up a bit and gave more of our time, our money, our possessions to give a lift to those who truly need it.

As the Christmas holiday season begins this Thanksgiving weekend, let's all try to go above and beyond and lend a hand to those who need it.  And a big thanks to Cassie and Chris who make me proud to be an American.  Unlike the celebrities and athletes who are splashed across the media for doing things that are often not particularly commendable, these two airmen like many other service men and women across the country deserve our deep appreciation.  I'm so honored to know you both.

A time for gratitude and kindness this Thanksgiving season

What to write about this week?  Seems the logical thing would be gratitude since we're only two days away from Thanksgiving.  But I write about that often.  I think we need to focus on gratitude daily not just once a year so I won't write about that.

How about kindness? I write about that a lot too.  Something that I believe we ought to practice daily as well.  I love one of Wayne Dyer's comments about kindness which might be helpful as families gather this Thanksgiving.  To paraphrase the good Dr. Dyer, he says that given a choice of being right or being kind, choose to be kind.  So when that talkative relative needs to be right on some issue this Thursday, let them be.  If they're really insistent about being right, they must really need the feeling, so choose kindness and let them have it or else you could end up in a fight and really let them have it! 

How about slowing down and being in the moment?  Probably wrote about that sometime too but there's something to be said about paying a little bit more attention to what we're doing whether it's making a favorite recipe, interacting with someone at a store, or driving on a last minute errand.  Slowing down mentally (and for some, that includes on the road) might give us the breathing space we need at this hectic time to be think about the gratitude and the kindness, to leave space to enjoy all that comes with a big holiday.

I hope to do all of the above this Thanksgiving week- to slow down, pay attention to those around me, look for things to be grateful for (and despite the challenging times, there's still plenty), to be kind.  To remember those we lost this year who we miss dearly, to cherish the ones who remain.  To enjoy the good food (I don't have to cook so I know it will be good!), the stories, the games, the laughter..

I wish the same and more for you!  Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

One year ago today...

I got an early text from my wonderful cousin Valerie this morning wishing me "Happy Oprah Anniversary!"  An unusual greeting for most people but for us, it has special meaning because one year ago today we were lucky enough to be in the audience for the last "Favorite Things" on the Oprah Winfrey Show.  (We're the 2 in the upper left)

So yes, we got a whole bunch of things and even better memories of our time with Oprah and her incredible staff.  But what I want to focus on most today is that we can't predict when a wonderful experience is just around the corner (same is true for negative ones but who wants to think or worry about those?). 

My cousin got the invitation for the show unexpectedly.  Yes, she had submitted information to the show in hopes of being invited but the chances are so slim.  And we almost didn't go because she was scheduled to babysit her grandson.  We had no idea what it would be about...but we did have a sneaking suspicion that it was going to be Favorite Things..  

If you're dragging yourself around in these challenging times, if you're bemoaning the lack of sunlight on these shortened days (dark at 4:30 pm - really??), if you're dealing with a difficult situation of some sort, how about opening your mind to the possibility that something great and unexpected is about to happen for you?  Rather than asking yourself a question like, "Why does everything bad happen to me?" or saying "This is going to be a horrible day", consider asking, "What great thing is going to happen next?"

I know this sounds simplistic and somewhat impossible perhaps, but I've had great luck with choosing to say something positive and have it followed by things working out pretty well.  From parking spaces to people I haven't seen in a long time to Oprah's Favorite Things (which I have to admit I hoped for once we got invited), good things have come my way on a pretty regular basis.  And I believe the same can happen for you...  Whether they happen or not, sure beats choosing to focus on all the negativity and worry.   

If you could use an in-person positive boost, please join me at one of my local free one hour seminars - "How to Thrive in Rocky Times" .  Space is limited so sign up early. Great break from the craziness of the holiday season.  Ideal for whole families, ages 13 and up!

11/11/11 at 11:11 pm

I'm sort of a umbers person and 11 has been my favorite number for quite a while.  So here we are with five 11's in a row.  How cool is that?  Or am I just a geek?  I'll let you decide on that.  As for me, I choose to see it in two parts:  finding joy in the simplest of things and not being defined by anyone else label for me. 

I love the moment, and finding what's good in it.  I love the chair I'm sitting in, the laptop that allows me to communicate, my dryer that just finished my jeans for tomorrow, the hum of my dishwasher, the coziness of my small living room, the fact that I just spent 2 hours watching and participating in Oprah's Life Class.  Little joys, big joys depending on your point of view. 

Noticing the little things and choosing to seek out joy makes for a much better day than looking for things that aggravate or annoy. I know ther'es plenty of those around but looking for them makes me experience them and I won't let my thoughts to there or stay there for very long.  After all, I get to choose what i want to think about and i say JOY!

As for labels, who gets to decide what I am except me?  Geek? I love to learn so if geek means someone who loves to learn, I say, "thank you!"  There's a quote from someone who I don't remember that says something like "when you label me, you diminish me".  Let's save labels for cans and just be.  So much more joyfurl when that happens.

I've got 2 more minutes to 11:11...so let me say please help me keep my mentor Oprah on OWN.  The world needs positive TV even if you don't choose to watch it yourself.  Spread the word to get more people to watch her network, even for just one show a day.  We spend enough time perpetuating the less than honorable people/shows/activities on the planet...let's do something that perpetuates good!

Happy 11/11/11   11:11!!

Freak storms provide more life lessons...

Can't believe it's a week after the freak New England pre Halloween snow storm and some people still don't have power. After going 4 days without it during hurricane Irene, I feel badly for those people who probably don't have heat either. My parents fell into that category last weekend, luckily for only a short time but it's clear that we need to make some changes to help ourselves out.
What kind of changes? Several types both personal and community/government based.    Things like:

• Make sure you're as ready as possible for whatever challege comes next.  Maybe a generator if you can afford it and use it safely, lots of batteries and little lanterns to put them in (found some at Walmart and Christmas tree shops for less than $5 each),   a cheap radio (got one after Irene on Amazon for under $10 to hear what's going on), food that won't spoil and water for everyone,  a cell phone charger either for in the house with your battery operated radio or one for your car, and a back-up plan of someone's house (or hotel) you can go to if it's just too cold or you're just going too crazy without power.
• Get the trees cut down near you that overhang wires or let's nag National Grid or whoever the electric company is to do so.  I heard on the radio last night that it would be cheaper for them to cut the trees back than it is for all the money they've lost between people without power and paying people to fix the lines

Our times are full of unexpected situations lately and it's up to all of us to be as prepared as possible so utitlities and towns/cities/municipalities can take care of the people who are unable to do so themselves. 

We also must look out for each other as much as we can, even if it's inconvenient, even if we're busy, especially the elderly who may be unable (or too stubborn) to do so.  And not forget the people who still are without (power, heat, food) while we're basking in our electricity supplied technology trance...

Let's all do our part to be prepared and help each other out... as cliched (sp?) as it sounds, we're all on this ride together and it's a much better ride if we look out for our fellow travelers

PS...I'm beginning a tour of libraries this week doing a free one hour seminar sharing some tips on how to thrive in the crazy times we're living in.  Check the web site for locations near you at www.ThriveinRockyTimes.com .  Suitable for ages 13 and up.  Bristol RI is up first on Thursday November 10th at 7 pm at Rogers Free Library